The Art of Brilliance Blog

I was driving home from a session all about ‘leading change’. To be honest I steer away from delivering the standard ‘change’ material. All that ‘unfreeze – change – refreeze’ stuff leaves me cold.

Instead, I decided to speak about what was really on my mind. I suggested that, as the human race, we are still very new to this planet. If we play our cards right, we’ve got a few million years left on the lease.

I then explained, in our trademark non-academic way, that a lot of the world’s current thinking is quite ‘medieval’. And by ‘medieval’ I mean ‘medieval’. For example, we still fight about money, territory and Gods.

And my mind flashed back to an article I’d read many years ago about how astronauts feel when they view Earth from a million miles away. Many of them comment on the tranquillity and beauty of our blue planet when viewed from afar.

And yet, here we are at ground level saying things like, ‘My God’s better than your God. Bang bang, you’re dead!’

Here’s a local and petty example. People from Liverpool (‘Scousers’) tend to have a general dislike of people from Manchester (‘Mancs’). It’s partly a football rivalry and probably a man thing, but stick with me, there’s a great point on the way. They hate each other so much that, famously, when there was a scarcity of maternity wards, expectant parents had to use the local veterinary hospital.

One night a Scouser and Manc turned up with their pregnant wives, along with a German Shepherd bitch called Lucy. Confused? So was the vet!

All were rushed into the delivery room and the men listened while there was a lot of panting, screaming and yelping from behind the door.

After a nervous couple of hours the vet emerged into the waiting room and explained there had been complications but not to worry as all the new born where fit and healthy. Phew! The only problem was during the turmoil of three females giving birth at once he hadn’t had time to tag the infants. “However,” he reassured them, “this shouldn’t cause too much of a problem because as their fathers you should find it very easy to recognise your own offspring.”

The Manc jumped up at the speed of a thousand gazelles and ran into the delivery room returning with the German Shepherd puppy lovingly cradled in his arms.

The vet looked confused. “That one can’t be yours sir,” he explained.

And the Manc said, “Up yours doc! I’m taking no chances. One of those babies in there is a Scouser!”

That is a lot of hatred!

However, consider this – if that very same Manc and Scouser went on a trip to London, they wouldn’t be a ‘Manc’ and ‘Scouser’ any more. They would unite as ‘northerners’, joining forces in the battle against ‘shandy-drinking southerners’.

Then if the northerner and southerner went on holiday to Spain, they would become ‘English’ and join forces against the Spanish. Being ‘English’ they would have too much sun, too many beers and chant racial slurs before drowning in their own sick.

However if ever the English and Spanish went on holiday to the USA they would then become ‘European’ and begin to hate the Americans. Then the Europeans and Americans go on holiday to somewhere in the Middle East… and I think you can see where this is going?

So the way I see it, what we need to bring the people of the world together in harmony and peace is… an alien invasion!

Think about it?

Then all the Muslims, Christians, Jews, Hindus, Buddhists and ginger people… in fact all the ethnic and minority groups would stand together in unity as one and shout:

“Come on you little green b*****s, we’ll have ya!”

For the members of my audience left awake, my point was, why wait for an alien invasion? Let’s unite now. Let’s forgive the mistakes of the past and understand we probably didn’t know any better and live out the remainder of our lease with positivity, harmony and happiness. Sounds awesome, right?

So, in part two of this blog, I’ll reveal what I’m doing to save the world.

Until next time

Andy W @artofbrillandyw

According to my esteemed co-author, Andy Whittaker, we’re all born perfect. But of course, in the interests of generating some debate, I totally disagree. We’re born completely and utterly flawed. You pop out into the world, someone slaps your backside (nice welcome!), you open your lungs and the starting pistol of life signals that you’re off…

You are you. You just don’t know it yet! And, eventually you get used to being you. You work out what works and doesn’t work for you. You suss the system.

But which bit is ‘you’?

Is it the body bit? Grab your ear lobe and feel the smoothness of it. The little hairs. That’s a bit of ‘you’, right? Or bite your lip. Ouch, that’s definitely ‘you’. Pull your hair. That’s attached (unless you’re wearing a syrup, in which case you’d probably best not pull it too hard) so that’s ‘you’ too. So there’s a physical ‘you’. That version of ‘you’ that’s basically a bunch of trillions of cells stuck together. And the physical ‘you’ is very important.

But ‘The Art of Being Brilliant’ is less about the ‘you’ that you see when you stand naked in front of the mirror. Yes, yes, we know there are a load of lumps, bumps and imperfections. But herein lies the clue to you number two. Who’s the one noticing your reflection? Who’s the one saying, ‘Best suck your belly in mate’? Who’s the one imagining how good you’d look if you actually put some effort into getting fit?

We reckon this is the real you. The lumpy, visible bunch of cells is just the mechanism you use to transport yourself around. The one in your head is the most important. The one that feels and connects. Some call it your spirit, or personality or inner voice.

If I ask you, ‘Do you talk to yourself’? The real you is the one who says, ‘I don’t know, do I?’

And that’s the version of ‘you’ that we want to engage. Because if we can get through to the realyou, our job is done.

Men will be men. Or will they? Roles are a-changing folks. In the olden days (ie, 30 years ago) men would go down the pit or out in their deep-sea trawlers. And they’d socialise with men. And there would be a clear male/female divide. I’m not arguing that this was good, but just that it was how it was. But it’s no longer how it is.

I am a male of the species. And look at what I don’t do… I don’t put shelves up or tinker under the bonnet of my car. I don’t decorate or tile the bathroom. I wouldn’t ever attempt to lay a patio or build a wall. I don’t really do gardening. I haven’t got a veg patch or allotment. I struggle with Ikea furniture.

Whereas my mate Pat is one of the last of a dying breed – a real man. He builds walls. And puts roofs on houses. And does plastering. Which means I’m delighted to be born into today’s world. Because in the old days when men were men, I’d have been a failure!

So, while a lot of people get a bit stuck in a rut of sameness and hark back to the ‘good old days’, I can’t think of anything worse? I’m thankful of the modern world. Because people are allowed to be who they want to be.

And that’s what ‘The Art of Being Brilliant’ is all about. It’s not about your job! It’s simply a reminder to be yourself, brilliantly!

Have a fab day

Andy

A young couple moved into a swanky apartment in a new neighbourhood. They sat in their kitchen having breakfast, watching the world go by. The woman saw her neighbour pegging out the washing. ‘That laundry’s not very clean,’ she tutted. ‘She either needs a new washing machine or better washing powder.’

Other than the crunching on his toast, her husband remained silent.

His wife’s comment was exactly the same the next day. And the next. ‘Why on earth is that woman hanging out dirty washing?’ she sighed in disgust. ‘She needs lessons in basic hygiene!’

And her husband crunched, knowingly.

On the fourth day his wife plonked herself at the breakfast table with a gleeful smile. ‘At last,’ she said, pointing at their neighbour’s washing line.’ Her husband followed her gaze to the neatly arranged clothes line where the whites sparkled and the colours shone. ‘All of a sudden she seems to have learned to clean properly.’

And her husband broke his silence. ‘I got up early this morning and cleaned our windows.’

And so it is with life. We view the world from inside our head. Our eyes are our windows on the world. Before we give any criticism, it might be a good idea to check our state of mind and ask ourselves if we are ready to see the good rather than to be looking for something in the person we are about to judge. It’s easy to be critical. It’s easy for our windows to become grimy.

So, to stretch the vision metaphor just a little bit too far, we don’t want you to go all ‘rose tinted’. Not everything in the world is good and bright and fantastic. But, if you follow our advice and view the world through our ‘positive tinted’ spectacles, the world’s a lot brighter than you think.

For our ‘old’ customers, you’ll be aware that we run awesome 2%ers events. For our ‘new’ customers, you need to get yourself booked onto the ‘happiness’ event of the year…

We describe this as the equivalent of a Willy Wonka Golden Ticket. Forget Glastonbury or the Wimbledon final. The summer event of the year is happening on 1 July 2013 at Alton Towers where we will be running one of our world famous 2%ers events.

Last year’s Alton Towers event is impossible to beat (we had the world famous Paul McGee plus Alex Steele’s awesome jazz band), so we’re not even going to try.

We’re not aiming for ‘better’, we’re going for ‘different’. You can expect a ‘back to basics’ gig, focusing on a heady mixture of happiness, wellbeing, flourishing and maybe a dash of NLP. In a nutshell, lots of thought-provoking material and plenty of laughs.

Timings are 10am till 3pm. Cost is nil (yes, it’s FREE!). There’s no catch. And there’s only one rule…no mood hoovers!

If you want to bag a place (or places) please email helen@artofbrilliance.co.uk

Cheers
Andy

Check out Cherie Carter-Scott’s rules of life, inspired by the Helen Keller’s quote, “Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.”

Fab stuff…

Rule One – You will receive a body. Whether you love it or hate it, it’s yours for life, so accept it. What counts is what’s inside.

Rule Two – You will be presented with lessons. Life is a constant learning experience, which every day provides opportunities for you to learn more.

Rule Three – There are no mistakes, only lessons. Your development towards wisdom is a process of experimentation, trial and error, so it’s inevitable things will not always go to plan or turn out how you’d want.

Rule Four – The lesson is repeated until learned. Lessons repeat until learned. What manifests as problems and challenges, irritations and frustrations are more lessons – they will repeat until you see them as such and learn from them.

Rule Five – Learning does not end. While you are alive there are always lessons to be learned. Surrender to the ‘rhythm of life’, don’t struggle against it.

Rule Six – “There” is no better than “here”. The other side of the hill may be greener than your own, but being there is not the key to endless happiness. Be grateful for and enjoy what you have, and where you are on your journey.

Rule Seven – Others are only mirrors of you. You love or hate something about another person according to what you love or hate about yourself. Be tolerant.

Rule Eight – What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need. What you do with them is up to you. ** Rule Nine – Your answers lie inside of you.** Trust your instincts and your innermost feelings, whether you hear them as a little voice or a flash of inspiration.

Rule Ten – You will forget all this at birth.

That 10th one is a real bummer!

Can I add one more rule?

Rule Eleven – Being positive is a learned behavior. The younger you learn it the better! It’s more difficult to be positive than negative and, because it takes a tad of effort and a bit of practice, most people can’t be bothered.

Any rules you’d like to add?

Technology is great. My internet connection was down for a few days and it was really difficult to work! No, really, sad as it may sound, I was hopelessly lost and unproductive. And, as always, it triggered some thoughts.

Drug addicts are called ‘users’…

…and the same word is applied to those of us who are addicted to gadgets. And I think I’m on the verge of an addiction. But, an addiction is only bad if it starts to become a problem, right?

I need a fix of emails every so often. The damned inbox sits there, pinging away during my working from home days, basically stopping me working from home! It’s a problem. I attend meetings where managers have 2 or 3 mobiles lined up on the desk. And at break time they don’t get a coffee, they scrabble for their mobiles. It’s a problem. It’s common for users to be using on trains and in supermarkets and even in the pub. It’s a problem. We see people sitting by the pool, emailing work. It’s most definitely a problem!

And, have you noticed that users are getting younger. I had an email from a friend who lives abroad. A newish mum in fact. She sent me a lovely pic of her daughter’s first birthday with a proud note that said, ‘she’s just about walking, gurgling and loves to pretend she’s on a mobile phone. It’s so sweet.’ Excuse me? Like it’s a good thing! It’s obviously a worldwide problem!

‘Blackberry’s have been nicknamed ‘crackberries’. There’s an epidemic of ‘toasted thigh syndrome’, caused by excessive use of a laptop on your knee. And, get this, there’s even ‘vibrating thigh syndrome’ (phantom vibrating in your pocket, even when your moby is switched off!). Have you experienced it? Yep, me too!

We’re Facebooking and Tweeting. We’re meeting our perfect partners on line. I really wish I had a solution. Maybe it’s not a problem at all? Maybe me having a problem with it is the problem? The juggernaught of technological progress ain’t going to wait for me.

What would a 2%er do? I guess they’d be positive about the change. I guess they’d go with the flow, do the best they can. But, at the forefront of my mind is this… my PhD research is showing, very clearly, that having strong human relationships is one of the major ingredients of happiness. I have an uneasy feeling that 100 friends on Facebook doesn’t actually equate to the same level of happiness as 1 genuine face-to-face flesh-and-blood chum who you can go to the pub with.

I’m confused about this blog. Technology is great? Right? But the top 10 happiest days of my life are all days that have been spent without technology.

And that’s worth thinking about.

A x

Having said all that – we’ll be running two half day Art of Being Brilliants at Exeter Uni on March 21st. Use technology to find out more… click here. Then switch of your mobiles and calm that vibrating thigh with a half day’s antidote to busyness!

A new year. And according to the press, it’s going to be another tough one!

So we do what we’ve always done… hunker down and try and get it over with! If we can get through 2013 then maybe 2014 will be better? Or, on a more short term basis, if we can survive Jan and Feb, the days will start getting longer and the green shoots of spring will start peeping through. But…

If you’re one of our merry band of enlightened ‘2%ers’ you’ll know that life’s too short to think like that. We haven’t got enough weeks left on this planet to count them down, wishing them away!

People go to extraordinary lengths to discover the meaning of life. They go on pilgrimages to monasteries in India. They pray. Sometimes really hard and for a long time. But the last place people look is right under their feet, in everyday activities and inside themselves.

The reason so many people cannot see the big red X that marks the spot is because they’re standing on it!

Maybe 2013 can be the year when you start looking for happiness in the right place?

I run a course called ‘The Art of Being Brilliant’. Quite honestly, I have the best job in the world, travelling to meet people from various businesses and schools to deliver something that really works. The results over the years have been magnificent. OK, so there have been a few failures, individuals who are so entrenched in their negativity that they are unshiftable, but they’ve been the exception rather than the rule.

And recently I came across a new challenge. It was an amazing business where I’ve met the best and worst delegates ever. Polar opposites! In the blue corner, some of the team members cared so passionately about being world class that they were going to amazing lengths to exceed customer expectations. And, in the red corner were some of the most intransigent energy vampires I’ve ever met. These employees were on a go slow, resisting all attempts to move with the times. Life was better in the old days. Negative about their managers and their jobs. Work was endured.

The curious thing is that the hard working ones were brimming with smiles. They were getting letters of thanks from their customers. They were glowing with brilliance. They were happier! And the go slows? Long faces. Default setting stuck on whinge mode. And most of all they came across as being very unhappy.

And in the middle sat the new apprentice, a fresh faced 16 year old, straight from school. Who will he side with? Tell you what, his choices over the next 12 months may well determine the outcome of his entire working life. Succumb to the dark side. Believe the harbingers of doom and become a purveyor of all things negative until moaning becomes normal. Or join in with the unfashionable bright siders. Work hard. Smile broadly. Enjoy the 9 to 5 experience and become enlightened into the ethos that hard work can be superb fun.

We all face crucial choices in life. Fingers crossed for the lad.

I love stories. I’ve just re-read Pollyanna. And it’s proof that, yes, you can be too happy! Her catch-phrase “there’s always something to be glad about” is very upbeat and positive. On first or second hearing that is! The lesson from Pollyanna is to turn it down a bit. When you’re so positive that people want to punch your lights out, you’re doing it wrong!

Tom Sawyer got it just about right. There’s a classic chapter where Tom uses the power of positivity to influence his chums. Tom’s aunt asks him to whitewash the fence. His friends call by and Tom is seen applying the paint with gusto, pretending to enjoy the chore. “Do you call this work?” Tom tells his mates. “Does a boy get a chance to whitewash a fence every day?”

Armed with this new information his friends discover the joys of whitewashing a fence. Before long, Tom’s friends are paying him for the privilege as well as deriving real pleasure from the task!

I reckon Tom’s a 2%er. He transformed a negative experience into a positive one. He’s influenced those around him in a positive way. In short, his enthusiasm is infectious. And I reckon there’s a message in there for all of us. Whatever job you are attending to right now, do it with passion, energy and enthusiasm. And when you get home, practice parenting in the same vein. You’ll feel great…and so will those around you

Happy whitewashing! A

A modern workplace parable, with a few random thoughts thrown in…

A senior manager had tickets to see the London Philharmonic perform Schubert’s Unfinished Symphony at the Royal Albert Hall. This was a rare treat because business was tough. In fact he’d spent the last week re-structuring his company, butchering the head count to improve the bottom line He enjoyed the concert. His tickets were charged to corporate hospitality but that didn’t stop him wincing at their face value. He decided to put some of his business cost-cutting ideas into practice. When he got home, he wrote a report to the RPO conductor…

“I enjoyed last night’s concert but couldn’t help thinking that the whole event was highly inefficient. At one point all 14 violins were playing the same note at the same time. I would recommend you only use 1 violinist in future.

The French horns merely repeated what the violins did and therefore I see no need for a horn section.

Many of the musicians expended excessive time and effort on playing rapid demi and semi quavers and I therefore recommend that all notes are rounded up to the nearest quaver. This has the added benefit of reducing the skill level so you could employ semi-skilled staff. This would be a massive money saver.

The oboe was used, on average, once every 15 minutes. It would therefore be prudent for the oboe player to play a selection of other instruments in his spare time.

If these recommendations are put into practice the concert could be reduced in time from 1 hour 43 minutes to 24 minutes and the number of musicians reduced from 57 to 8.

If Schubert had had this foresight he would undoubtedly have had time to finish the symphony.”

There’s a message in there somewhere folks. The modern world is striving for super-efficiency and cost-cutting. There’s no doubting these are important. But our belief is that quality shines through. Cut costs by all means. But please make sure you don’t reduce the value of what you’re delivering.

I like this story…

Baby bear goes downstairs, sits in his small chair at the table. He looks into his small bowl. It is empty. ‘Who’s been eating my porridge?’ he squeaks.

Daddy Bear arrives at the big table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big bowl and it is also empty. ‘Who’s been eating my porridge?!?’ he roars.

Mummy Bear puts her head through the serving hatch from the kitchen and yells

“For God’s sake, how many times do I have to go through this with you idiots? It was Mummy Bear who got up first. It was Mummy Bear who woke everyone in the house. It was Mummy Bear who made the coffee. It was Mummy Bear who unloaded the dishwasher from last night and put everything away. It was Mummy Bear who swept the floor in the kitchen. It was Mummy Bear who went out in the cold early morning air to fetch the newspaper and croissants. It was Mummy Bear who set the damn table.

“It was Mummy Bear who walked the bloody dog, cleaned the cat’s litter tray, gave them their food, and refilled their water.

“And now that you’ve decided to drag your sorry bear-arses downstairs and grace Mummy Bear with your grumpy presence, listen carefully, because I’m only going to say this once….

“I HAVEN’T MADE THE F****** PORRIDGE YET!”

I’ll tell you why I like it. Because even brilliant people can lose their rag. Being a 2%er isn’t about always being right or always being nicey-nicey. It’s not about sticking an inane grin on your face and pretending to be happy when you’re seriously hacked off. Sometimes it’s perfectly OK to be angry and upset. And, hopefully, if this message has sunk in with daddy and baby bears everywhere and you will make mummy bear’s porridge in future.